Frat Boys and Shabbos

I’ve been thinking lately about how much this place feels like a frat and it makes me sick at times. I mean there was a reason I stayed away from frats in college and now scarcely under a year and a half out of college I feel stuck in one. Maybe it’s just me, maybe it’s all in my head but there are times I just want to scream and shout. Case in point, my whole life I’ve had guy friends, but usually my closest friends end up being women. I’ve always had an easier time confiding in them, and here I scarcely have the opportunity to meet the kind of girls I could become friends with, it’s tough for me at times. It can be an isolating feeling, feeling like there is no one here who I can truly confide in. Who can relate to me in a meaningful way. And the Frat mentality of this place is just weird I’ve never been a guy’s guy, I’m not the type. Luckily I’ve made great friends and have plenty to keep myself occupied, I’m very happy with my decision to come here and I have no intention of leaving but it can be difficult and I suspect that will never change. Today at the Shabbos table I almost punched a kid in the face. We were talking about our families, how we spend the holidays and he kept asking me what the point was if we didn’t do it exactly right, if we made compromises then why do it at all? Now this kid grew up in a Frum home, with Frum friends in his own little universe. He doesn’t know anything else, doesn’t understand what it like for kids like me who grew up in non-observant homes. But I have to say his cheek really got to me. I mean how dare he question my family, tell me that we’re not authentic and if we don’t do everything exactly ‘perfect’ then why bother. In the end I just closed my mouth and ate a wonderful Shabbos lunch. Luckily I didn’t let that ruin my Shabbos. Last night a few friends and I had dinner with one of the Rabbi’s from Aish, he makes his own wine, and is an amazing man. Sitting at the table with him, listening to him speak, about life, love and Judaism was truly inspiring. We all stumbled happily back to the Old City and fell soundly asleep. After the lunch incident, I took a nap and ended Shabbat with Havdallah at the Kotel. It’s still an incredible experience to get to walk down there whenever I want to. That’s all from the Holy land for today it’s starting to get cold and I’m headed off to bed. I also want to apologize to everyone for not emailing more often, I truly love hearing from all of you, it makes me smile to see my mail box full. Eretz Israel.