The Darkness

Right at this moment I'm staring at an e-ticket it has a date on it September 25, 2008 that is when according to the ticket that I'm going back to America. I've been pondering that date now for almost eight months. So strange, so very strange, after consulting with many people Rabbis, family members, etc I've decided that I need to come home earlier like at the end of August and you know what? Thats only a month an a half away. It feels as though I only got to this country yesterday, time seems like its been standing still. I was thinking about my first few days here, I was completely confused, I had just finish work, finished packing up an apartment and a life. I felt like I had made a huge mistake. Then I settled in go used to the flow and the rhythm of life here and before I knew it my parents and sister and brother in law were visiting. The day my parents left was the day I changed my ticket, it had me leaving on January 25th, nine months I pushed it back. I seemed like an eternity and now again I find myself sitting down and trying to set a date. And you know what? I'm scared. When it really comes down to it most of the things on life that we fear, we don't really fear as Dumbledore tells Harry "There is nothing to be feared from a dead body, any more then there is anything to be feared from the darkness. Lord Voldemort, who of course secretly fears both disagrees. But once again he reveals his own lack of wisdom. It is the unknown we fear when we look upon death and darkness, nothing more." As so I find my self staring into a void. When I left so many months ago I didn't know what to expect, and now and I'm beginning to see the shimmer of light in the darkness, again I am afraid of what lies on the other side. And yet I digress, because I'm also excited to go home, to see my family, to share with them the experiences that I have had here. I'm excited to have a new adventure and to find my way again. But really I'm just excited that I managed to squeeze a Harry Potter reference into a post :) Shalom from Eretz Israel, I'll see you in the diaspora soon.