New York City Dreaming

Is December really almost over already? Wow, my parents will be here tomorrow so I'm staying in Tel Aviv for shabbat. Hopefully I'll get a chance to update the site in the next week but I doubt I'll have the chance, I hope everyone had a very Merry Christmas and a good New Year's, missing NYC but loving Israel.

Hanukkah: Wrap Up

Getting to be in Jerusalem for Hanukkah is an experience I never thought I’d have, seeing the curious tourists wander around the streets of the Jewish Quarter taking pictures of us lighting our menorahs has been quite a sight. It was also really nice to have a break from our normally packed schedule, me and my friends used the time well, mostly goofing off and going to the many parties thrown. I got to see my friend Ben perform twice, he brought the house down with his raps. Rabbi Yom Tov Glazer had a party it was in the Cardo square amongst the columns, he performed along with Ben and a few other Aish students. Aish had two parties one was just for the Pre-Intermediate group that I’m in we mostly danced, ate jelly doughnuts and sang songs, they even brought in a famous composer who’s name I can’t remember. The other was for the whole school, the night started with a comedy / music show during dinner and then moved up to the Beis Medrish for music, singing and dancing (noticing a theme here?) they did a great job with both parties. The last party I went to was at Rabbi Hurwitz’s home in Mea Shearim, drinking, singing and eating was the theme of the night. We had a blast, with all that going on we also celebrated the birthday of my friend Todd last night, I needed a nice long nap yesterday afternoon to prepare for another late night. Tomorrow we head up to the north for a week, it should be great and in just a little over two weeks my family will be here! It’s a very exciting time here in Israel and I know the next month is going to fly by. The weather has been so beautiful I have a hard time remembering it’s the middle of December, much love and of course Eretz Israel.

Hanukkah: night 8

How many ways can you spell this holiday? I don’t know but it must be a lot. As I sit in my room I glance over and see my roommate’s menorah lit up and I can’t help but to be filled with a sense of wonder and awe. Hanukkah is the festival of lights it occupies a special place in the hearts of all Jews. It is the one holiday that even the most secular of Jews celebrates and it is the only holiday not mentioned in the Hebrew Bible. Hanukkah is a rabbinical holiday, it commemorates the date the Holy Temple was retaken, cleaned and rededicated. It is a symbol for our people it lets us know that even in the darkest hour our light still survives. Hanukkah was the first ideological war fought in human history. The Greeks weren’t just killing Jews; they were trying to kill Judaism and they were stopped, this wasn’t a war against the physical body it was a war against the very soul of the Jewish Nation. And so for eight days we celebrate Hanukkah we light lights which we are forbidden from using for any purpose. We are instructed to sit with our lights, to sing songs, eat greasy food and talk Torah, and remember that even in the darkest of times we have hope. Eretz Israel.

Alone Time

Alone time is hard to get around here; I in fact, realize I’ve come to forget what the word actually means. Its part of the charm of this place people pop in and out it’s always moving never stopping. In this rush I can get lost in myself, forget what it feels like to be alone. I’ve found that there are only a few things that give me relief in this environment. One is sleep, after a day of learning my dreams are a safe haven I blow off steam in my head every single night. I wake up more often then not ready to start the day, a shower and twenty five minutes of prayer later I’m ready for breakfast. Sometimes those twenty five minutes are the only moments of clarity I get a day. Sometimes they’re not, but I’ve stopped needing the amazing time. It’s okay to have those twenty five minutes to myself, either way it’s the best part of my day, I hold it holy. Writing this blog has given me an amazing opportunity to examine myself. I really need a little alone time to write and dig inside my head. Thanks to all of you reading this blog and joining me in this journey, it wouldn’t be the same without you.

Rabbi Quote

Physics is the physical equivalent of spirituality, just as in physics everything has an equal and opposite reaction, so to in the spiritual world everything has an equal and opposite reaction. R. - Lichtman

Approval and Acceptance

Inspiration doesn’t come cheap, or so I’m told. After being in Israel for seven weeks I’ve had a little writers block, its difficult day in and day out to properly describe my experiences in the Holy Land. With every passing week my calendar gets more filled up and my free time shrinks. And what gets pushed to the side? My writing naturally but I’m making an effort to get thoughts down at least twice a week even if you all only get to see them every other week. We have a new guy in our room, he’s here for the next three weeks and it’s very strange. He’s a great guy fits right in, but what’s strange about it is he makes me realize how much I’ve grown in the last two months. How my expectations of what’s normal and accepted have changed. For instance every time this kid opens his mouth every third word is a swear word. I’m not going to claim I never swear but I’ve grown used to a different manner of speaking. Almost no one here swears casually. In fact most of the guys here never swear at all, and I hadn’t realized how used to that I’ve gotten. Also I hear him critique the Rabbi’s at Aish and I realize that many of the problems I have with them I’ve grown used to. It’s not that I now agree with everything they say, but more often then not I don’t let it get to me. I’ve come to accept them as the wonderful human beings they are; even if I don’t approve of everything they believe in or of how they live their lives. Because there is a big difference between approval and acceptance and if you figure that out your life will become a lot simpler, you won’t get as riled up about as many things. Because the bottom line is there are many, many, many people in this world whose lifestyles I don’t approve of. But just because I don’t approve of their lifestyles that doesn’t mean I can’t accept them as human beings. That doesn’t mean I can’t love them as human beings. And it doesn’t mean I can’t appreciate the beauty of their souls. Learn this dear friends it will serve you well.

Class Notes: Prayer & Hanukkah

Enjoy…

“Who is for the lord, follow me.” – Mattisyahu: a battle in the story of Hanukkah

Essential message of Hanukkah: The power of light over darkness. Be willing to fight with your life to protect what you believe in. Having a meaningful life is more important then life itself.

Sin: Hebrew: To miss i.e. when we ‘sin’ we’re searching for pleasure and missing the mark or going about getting pleasure in the wrong way.

In the first line of the Shema we say god’s name twice, why? The first time we’re choosing him and no other, the second time we’re acknowledging his unity. When saying the Shema one should focus on the love of Hashem.

1st line of the Shema:
Shema: Internal focus
Israel: what am I doing this for? Why am I here? I’m a servant of god, I serve god.
A’n’i: He is my master, Hashem is was and always will be, the infiniteness, implies giving no limitations.
Eloheinu: strict justice, power comes from truth
A’n’i: What the four letters in gods name represent
Ehad: god is in all directions, the oneness, everywhere, if nothing else existed god would still exist.

When saying the Shemoneh Esrei one should focus on the recognition of greatness, fear and awe of god.

Three essential parts to prayer:
1) To praise, the recognize the greatness of god
2) To depend on god, to ask of him
3) To thank god

Before prayer one must remove all thoughts, you can’t just think it you need to say it in this way our hearts and mouths become one.

When a person prays with the right intentions they leave this world and go to god, picture yourself in the Holy of Holies, imagine standing before god.

Baruch: means expansiveness, a source of openness, may Hashem please be expanded in through this prayer. The power of prayer is it can bring about Hashem in this world, though your words/actions/blessings. May your awareness be expanded.

Five tools for prayer:
1) Anticipate that god wants to help you and only wants what’s best for you: he has the power and wants to give it to you.
2) After you expect to be given, be shocked when you don’t get it and think about why you not getting what you want, and respond to god.
3) Listen and pay attention to the lessons god sends your way.
4) Focus on what you want, be clear, don’t ask for things you know you shouldn’t have / are doing the wrong thing. Don’t fool yourself about your motives.
Within this step try to get to the root, ask yourself why you really want something, and then ask for what you actually want. When god gives it to you you’ll have an easier time recognizing it.
5) Make and effort try hard, the more you work on it the more it will be worth to you and the more you will grow. Ask how much am I really prepared to sacrifice? What’s it really worth to me.

Chanukah: night 1

The festival of lights is upon us in Jerusalem, the entire Jewish Quarter lit their first Chanukah candles tonight and it was a beautiful sight. My eight roommates and I all gathered outside with the rest of families. We talked and laughed and sang. We also have a new roommate in the Cardo for the next few weeks; he’s a cool guy and fits right into our dynamic. In fact all in all life has significantly improved around here. I’ve been making things I want materialize which is always fun. For instance I’ve been feeling very disconnected from the outside world and couldn’t find English newspapers. So what happens? A shop right next to my apartment started carrying them. If only the internet access was better then I’d be set. Unfortunately it’s mediocre with the cold setting in and my free time disappearing, I’m now on the 7th day without getting online. I don’t hate it, it can be really nice having a break from the online world, but there are those moments that I’d just like to be able to check my email and update this blog without having to go anywhere. This last week I took a series of classes at night called the “Possible You” it’s all about self actualization. I found myself sitting in the class realizing how good I’ve had it. And although I don’t feel like I really needed it, I keep finding myself using phrases from it, so it was a positive experience all in all. Once again I realize I haven’t written emails to people in a while, I feel bad but I simply haven’t had the time, to much learning and having fun makes Myles a tired boy. That’s all for now from Jerusalem. Enjoy the eight magical nights.

The North Country

No new posts in over two weeks wow! I have a lot of new material written, but due to computer issues I havn't been able to post them. My parents will be here in two weeks and hopefully I'll be able to solve my computer problems then. For now I'm up North for the week with my pre-intermediate class, exploring the Golan Heights, and having fun.

Editor's note

I wasn’t able to get on the internet for a week and a half I’ve just posted everything I’ve written since the 15th of November, sorry about a lack of updates, I hope this makes up for it. Also Great news today nothing got accomplished at the peace conferences!! So I’m still safe here for the moment, love you all, be well.

No TV and no beer makes Homer something, something…

This is my 11th day with no internet. It’s been weird between internet issues and bad weather I haven’t posted anything I’ve wrote in quite a while. Haven’t checked my email or the box scores for the NFL, don’t know what the Giants record is or what’s going on in the world. No internet, television, newspapers or magazines in quite a whole. Being here has taken me away from so many of the things I loved in America. And by and large I don’t miss most of those things. It’s strange to think about where I’ve gone in the last month. How I’ve grown and learned and what I’ve experienced. It can be difficult living in such a strange place. Jerusalem certainly attracts an interesting (crazy) bunch of people. The weather has turned in the last week; days are sunny with cool breezes and not to cold, but nights have gotten cold. The weather feels very sterile in Jerusalem, its not overly cold temperature wise but there’s a steady breeze that’s persistent it rolls up and down the hillside with an occasional burst of fast cold air coming through. If you’re not properly covered you will get cold quickly. The wind combined with some much needed rain has helped Jerusalem welcome in winter. Enjoying my time here, don’t know when I’ll be home, shalom.

Sunday Night & the Peace Conference

Had an interesting night tonight, its weird how single days can be such a microcosm of your life. I agreed to go to a rally supporting a unified Jerusalem. I woke up with a bad feeling about the rally, after my last experience in Hebron, what can I say, I got a little scared. It wasn’t my finest hour and yet it really was a great hour for me. It defined what I’ve always been about. I’ve always talked about getting involved in politics but when it comes time to do something. I’ve inevitably come to the conclusion that the people involved in making any significant chance don’t really want change. So I decided to head down to the Kotel with my friends and pray instead of protesting. Maybe it was a selfish decision, maybe not. I committed to something that I wasn’t really sure of in a moment of a fierce patriotism I don’t really feel. When the peace conference clears I don’t’ expect real progress to be made. I think the conferences are a lot of sound and fury signifying nothing. Hopefully I will be proved right. After talking with the staff and student body at Aish, I began to realize how I really saw the rally. That I don’t ultimately believe that protests do much to change opinion and that our decision to spend some time praying was as worth while a pursuit as our friends decision to go to the rally. It felt like the right thing to do because you need a balance you need both the physical (the rally) and the spiritual (praying) one without the other is useless, I hope when the dust has settled on this conference, Jerusalem is still firmly in Israeli hands, to split an already divided city would be nothing more then folly. All you need to do is look at what happened in Gaza to know what the outcome will be if the Israeli government allows the Palestinian Arab’s to control a piece of territory in the heart of the Jewish state, both literally and figuratively. It’s one thing to read newspapers in the United States and think about this theory and that theory. All that is useless without a first hand view and my view is of the Kotel and East Jerusalem every single day, but that’s just my opinion I could be wrong.

Being Here Now

I’ve been having trouble being here lately, I think it’s just a bit of culture shock, but it can be really hard being here sometimes. I feel a little like Jacob, struggling with god. Luckily I have people in my life who have and continue to help me along the way. I thought I was going to freak out yesterday, I really couldn’t deal. I had to call my mom; I didn’t even stop to think that it was 6:30am in New York. I just needed to talk, to express myself to someone who wasn’t dealing with the same issues everyone here is. What I mean to say by that is simply all the people I meet here are on a journey, both literally and figuratively, we’re all here because we’re searching for meaning. Not that that ever stops, I just needed someone who’s lived a little longer, someone who really knows me. And that person was mom, I’m incredibly lucky to have a mom who understands me so well. After a 30 minute talk with her I was feeling much better. I’ve always been a thinker who went against the grain and here there are times when I feel like I’m trapped in a corner, that it’s everyone against me, and that’s hard to deal with. I feel like my beliefs are constantly under attack, as a liberal (albeit a moderate one) I’m always facing an uphill battle of ideas. For better or worse I’ve never accepted anything at face value, never gone along with anything just because everyone else was. Most of the time, I’m happy here I’d put the number at 92%, I’ve met wonderful people, conversations here are always interesting, everyone is a free thinker and everyone is searching for truth. It’s an incredible experience to be surrounded by such beauty. But the 8% of the time I’m unhappy I feel really unhappy and that’s just how it is. I grow tired of hearing about how god is in control of everything, about god this and god that. I just want a little perspective in those moments; I want to be able to question gods’ laws, and to find my own truth. In Judaism we have the idea that everyone is judged by their own merits. That everyone is supposed to find their own way within their Judaism. It’s ideal to keep all the mitzvoth but no one can keep them all but we all must strive for perfection. And that’s what life is about striving for truth and seeking always to perfect ourselves. And that’s why I’m here.

Emotions

I really feel like a girl at this Yeshiva. Allow me to elaborate, I feel like I’m constantly talking about feelings here, that all I ever hear is about reason and logic. While the emotional aspects of life are cast aside, treated as irrelevant or unimportant, and you know what? It sucks. I feel like most of the Rabbi’s here cast aside what to me is a fundamental part of the equation. That is to say you can reason all you want, but at then end of the day we all have to make a jump. That is no matter what you believe everyone has to deal with the fact that we’re required to have a bit of faith. Now I’m not trying to suggest that you make decisions in life on pure faith, that would be ridiculous but I do believe that life demands an element of the unknown, the mysterious, the mystical. I mean haven’t you ever been in a situation where you just intuitively knew something? You couldn’t explain why you knew but you just did, you didn’t need all of the evidence in fact once you got more information your judgment became clouded and you fooled yourself into a decision that you just knew was wrong? Maybe it’s just me; it can be so frustrating when you hear that this can’t be explained about the human body and that can’t be explained about evolution so if we don’t know then it must be god. Why does it have to be god? What if we just haven’t come far enough in our understanding of the world to know yet? What if the answer is out there and we just can’t see it. A lack of evidence and information doesn’t mean we should stick god into every space. What it means is we should continue to look, continue to imagine and dream. In the end I’ll stick with Einstein who said “Religion without science is lame, science without religion is blind.”

Daniel’s Birthday (and how I fell into the Matrix)

It was my friend Daniel’s birthday on Saturday and we knew we needed to do it right, we’re all far away from home and I knew that if it was me I’d like a big deal to be made of it. So with that in mind we knew what needed to be done. The night started with a few of us sitting around the Old City, after having a few (or maybe more then a few) drinks we headed off. Daniel with his new San Diego Chargers kippa on (courtesy of me and others) couldn’t thank us enough. So we hit the town, wandering around and making a night of it. Our first stop was a sports bar, loud 80’s music blared and the 1995 NBA finals were on the TV, we got to see the Magic lead by a very young looking Shaq blow and 20 point lead and lose to the Houston Rockets. Before to long we headed off, and then I feel into the Matrix, my friends directed us into an underground club, it was very cool. Loud trance music was playing and everyone was having a good time. We quickly settled in, grabbing a table in the back, dancing, drinking and having a great time. As the night drew on our numbers diminished. My friend Todd and I met an Ex-Israeli special operations solider and had a wild conversation. It is absolutely incredible to hear these guys talk about what it takes to enter Gaza, to kill another human being and the psychological effect it has on them, it was without a doubt the highlight of the night. Before long the night wound down and we headed for home. After hearing Todd talk about this place called Burger’s Bar the entire week before I had to check it out. Twenty minutes later a very satisfied crew got up and headed for home, I’ve got to say it was one of the best burger’s I’ve ever had and its kosher. As we were walking back I looked around and I have to say the new city of Jerusalem is a weird place, there’s a lot of activity. People mill around at all hours, there are a lot of young kids out and at times I feel very uncomfortable, very weird. As my head hit the pillow and my eyes closed I couldn’t help but think about yet another successful night in an incredible place.

Shabbos IV

First I’d like to thank Led Zeppelin for my post this evening now… Another week another Shabbos; after a long tiring week of classes nothing could have been better. For this weeks festivities my plans were made for me, my friend Joey got invited to dinner in Mea Shearim and I tagged along. After a rousing game of baseball in the morning, Shabbos quickly fell and off we went in search of our host. After a little confusion we made it to our destination. When we arrived we were greeted warmly and before we knew it we were engaged in song and dance, with our host’s warm voice ringing loudly off the walls. Just when I thought I’d drop we settled in for dinner, we talked and talked. Our host (who’s name I can’t remember) had an incredible story to tell. A hippie from Berkeley California, he and his wife moved to Israel twenty two years ago looking for meaning. They found that meaning in Hassidim, and now all these years later take delight in meeting guests on their own personal quests. One of my favorite things about Jerusalem is the crowd it attracts, where else in the world would you find and old hippie whose kids are Israeli Hassid’s. If you met the parents and children separately you’d never believe they’re related. The meal was exciting; Hassidim’s focus is on joy and arousing the soul and so you get a fusion of strict custom and structure with singing and dancing. After many festivities we headed home. I headed into the Old City and ran into friends in the Rova Square. My friend Ricky is a magician and treated all of us to card tricks, it was quite a show! After a long night I headed off to sleep. I slept in, waking up just in time to head off to my friends place up the hill from me. It was a relaxing lunch, and I was happy to spend it with familiar people. I’ve been noticing lately that I’ve really settled into the rhythm around here, it’s lovely. A few glasses of wine later the sun began to set and another Shabbos came to an end. With that I headed home to relax for a bit before heading out for my friend Daniel’s Birthday celebrations…

Flowing in a Structured Environment

I’m a flow guy, I like parameters but once I know where the boundaries are I like to flow within them. It’s important to me to know where I am and what’s acceptable behavior for the situation I’m in, but once I’m in it I like to float around, drama is unnecessary in my world. What am I talking about you might ask. Here’s how it is human beings all have comfort zones, in order to live meaningful lives we need to seek out those zones, find a niche within it and proceed. Living in Israel pushed this concept into my consciousness like a jackhammer. Because here I have no choice but to interact with all kinds of people on a daily basis, some I like others not so much. It’s difficult I haven’t had to share space with to many people in a long while. In New York, I had one roommate; in Connecticut I had three other roommates in a good sized place. Here I have ten other roommates and there aren’t a ton of distractions. And it’s not as easy to separate.

Three weeks (and counting)

I’ve been in Israel for three weeks, and can I just say @#*(@+_$#!!!!! (got all that ;) I mean really it’s been three weeks, where did the time go? Since I’ve arrived I’ve been though so many different emotions, had so many experiences, and learned so much that it makes my head hurt just thinking about it. I can hardly believe that Jerusalem has become home and my life in New York feels like a distance memory. I don’t even associate myself with it anymore. That’s not to say I don’t miss it because I do. I miss my little apartment, a quiet piece of real estate, where I could insulate myself from the outside world. I miss my privacy and the satisfaction I got knowing that I was a self-sufficient creature. Mostly though I miss my family and friends, it feels like a little hole in my heart knowing that I’ll miss Thanksgiving for the first time in my life. Thinking about friends going to see Islanders games without me, living lives that I no longer have any tangible connection with, other then the connections that were made and forged in what feels like another life time. I miss being able to call people whenever I want to as opposed to having to think about the seven hour time difference. And yet I’m happy here, there are up’s and downs but I know I’m where I’m supposed to be, doing what I’m supposed to be doing. I’ve had a busy week, now that I’ve had sometime to adjust I’m starting to get rolling with classes. I’m learning about the finer points of Jewish law and philosophy, and I’m making my way though the deep waters and figuring out where I stand in them. Last night I went to a shiur (lecture) at Mayanot, it’s a Chabbad Yeshiva. I love going to shiurs there I love they’re style, whenever they talk its all about the feeling. How did this person feel about this decision? It’s a different style then we’re taught, so its fun to get a diverse perspective on what I’m learning. I went with some friends and on the way there had a uniquely Jerusalem experience. As we were walking a door opened and a man with a beard beckoned us in. They were about to do evening prayers and they needed a minyan (ten men) so before we knew it we were davening with people we had never met before, only in Jerusalem!! That’s just how this place is, people come from all over to be a part of what’s happening here and you can really feel it, and I’m excited to be a part of it. I’ve been learning with a friend who’s connected to a couple I know from New York. He’s a great guy, has a great family and lives two minutes from me in the Old City. Yesterday we started going over the construction of the gemara, how its put together and how the arguments are constructed. Soon we’re going to get into it further, I can’t wait until now so much of what I’ve done and learned has been theoretical. Once I start learning Talmud I’ll finally be into the source of the material that all this philosophy actually comes from, which is a big step for me. It’s going to be a wild ride and I’m just doing my best to hang on, Eretz Israel.

Frat Boys and Shabbos

I’ve been thinking lately about how much this place feels like a frat and it makes me sick at times. I mean there was a reason I stayed away from frats in college and now scarcely under a year and a half out of college I feel stuck in one. Maybe it’s just me, maybe it’s all in my head but there are times I just want to scream and shout. Case in point, my whole life I’ve had guy friends, but usually my closest friends end up being women. I’ve always had an easier time confiding in them, and here I scarcely have the opportunity to meet the kind of girls I could become friends with, it’s tough for me at times. It can be an isolating feeling, feeling like there is no one here who I can truly confide in. Who can relate to me in a meaningful way. And the Frat mentality of this place is just weird I’ve never been a guy’s guy, I’m not the type. Luckily I’ve made great friends and have plenty to keep myself occupied, I’m very happy with my decision to come here and I have no intention of leaving but it can be difficult and I suspect that will never change. Today at the Shabbos table I almost punched a kid in the face. We were talking about our families, how we spend the holidays and he kept asking me what the point was if we didn’t do it exactly right, if we made compromises then why do it at all? Now this kid grew up in a Frum home, with Frum friends in his own little universe. He doesn’t know anything else, doesn’t understand what it like for kids like me who grew up in non-observant homes. But I have to say his cheek really got to me. I mean how dare he question my family, tell me that we’re not authentic and if we don’t do everything exactly ‘perfect’ then why bother. In the end I just closed my mouth and ate a wonderful Shabbos lunch. Luckily I didn’t let that ruin my Shabbos. Last night a few friends and I had dinner with one of the Rabbi’s from Aish, he makes his own wine, and is an amazing man. Sitting at the table with him, listening to him speak, about life, love and Judaism was truly inspiring. We all stumbled happily back to the Old City and fell soundly asleep. After the lunch incident, I took a nap and ended Shabbat with Havdallah at the Kotel. It’s still an incredible experience to get to walk down there whenever I want to. That’s all from the Holy land for today it’s starting to get cold and I’m headed off to bed. I also want to apologize to everyone for not emailing more often, I truly love hearing from all of you, it makes me smile to see my mail box full. Eretz Israel.

Mea Shearim

I had a tour of Mea Shearim last week and it’s been on my mind a lot since then. Mea Shearim is the first settlement built around Jerusalem; it is also one of the most religious communities around. Walking though it I couldn’t help being stuck by mixed emotions. It’s a beautiful place, bustling, frenetic and warm. People walk around with kids hanging on to their mother’s arms, every dialect of Hebrew, English and other languages can be heard spoken in the crowded streets. The smell of fresh baked breads and sweets waft in the air. And yet I can’t help but feeling incredibly sad. I feel as though I’ve been transported back in time, I feel like these people have cut themselves off from the world, without thinking about what exists outside of their little community. At the same time you can’t help but realize the people living in this community see every type of person imaginable, they’re exposed to all walks of life. It can’t be helped its such an amazing community that anyone who comes to Jerusalem wants to see it. In a weird way the people growing up in Mea Shearim see more people then anyone else in the world. It’s so strange, the people who live in this community are happy, it’s plainly obvious. But that’s not reality, is it? Now here’s the thing, these people live largely happy lives, they’re happy where they are and though some grow up and leave, many of them choose to stay right where they are. It’s a community where everyone knows one another, where people help each other. When you walk down the road people look each other in the eye, they stop frequently engaging each other in conversation, haggling over the price of little items. But once again, is this reality? How can anyone be sure of what reality is? Perhaps what I consider the real world is totally false, maybe these people have it right and I have it completely wrong. And what if I am wrong? What if the way I live my life is totally false? I know a man who lives in Mea Shearim, he’s seen the world and this in the place he has chosen. He has a great family, and loves his life, he’s been all around the world and this is the place he’s chosen, where will I choose? What’s my version of reality?

Another week another dollar (or something of the sort)

Just to update my status from the last post I’m feeling much better today. After two days of terrible stomach pains I woke up this morning feeling fine. From talking with the locals I came to the conclusion that it was the water. Basically water is treated differently everywhere and just about everyone who comes to Israel deals with their body adjusting to it around the two week mark, thank god for feeling better. Some friends and I went to a park last night and had a bonfire, it was a great crowd of people with everyone singing, talking, etc. I spent most of the time tending the fire and looking up at the night sky, the clouds were low; it was beautiful. I can’t believe that it’s Thursday already and another Shabbos is almost upon us. The first week of classes I had here were all discombobulated, meant to be a general overview with no continuity from class to class or day to day. Now that I’ve moved into a new program every class builds on the other so we cover a lot more. I’m very grateful for a new challenge. This whole trip is starting to feel very real. It’s gotten past the point of being a vacation. I was talking with my sister a little while ago, about this blog about some of the things I’ve written and one thing that came up was how living in the Old City can be like living in a bubble. I have a class that teaches Jewish Morals and Ethics and we talked about modesty this week. How when you live around things you very quickly become accustomed to those things. And after a while you don’t even realize what you’re seeing and fail to see what could be wrong with it. I know it will be weird going back to America when I eventually do and watching television again, seeing magazines and newspapers, I wonder how I’ll feel about it all. It’s just not like that here, your not exposed to the openness of American culture, everything in the Old City revolves around the beliefs of the people living here and those beliefs are very different then those of New York. It’s all strange and exciting learning about so many new topics, thinking and rethinking how I live my life. So all in all another wonderful week, this place continues to amaze me. Eretz Israel.

Ugh

My stomach hurts, I think I had a mild fever last night and I had strange dreams involving Harry Potter and Lord Voldemort they were very, very weird. It also is looking like rain here in the Old City, I think I’ll hole up tonight and read. I’ve been feeling like I haven’t been doing enough lately. That I should be learning more, pushing myself harder, I don’t know. I think I’ve been going pretty hard, and I think I need to relax a little, take it easy for a few days. I’m not sure what has brought about these feelings. I but I suppose it was due. Not every moment can be wonderful, this is life after all and ups and downs are a part of the deal. I went to a lecture at Mayanot last light, I have to say Chassidish can be cool, I like the emphasis on feelings. I’m going to take it easy and Read: Into the Wild it’s a fantastic book. Those of you in New York should check out Yom Tov Glazer tonight at Aish NY, its in the 80’s on the West Side, I can guarantee an interesting lecture if you attend.

Hebron

Who are you??
What are you doing here??
Where are you from??
Do you know the person your with??

Before I knew it the world was buzzing around me I was surrounded by five or six people some in IDF uniforms, some in plain clothes, I was asked for my passport and peppered with questions, welcome to Hebron. Let’s start at the beginning. Early this week we studied the weeks Parasha, the portion of the Torah that we read from that week. Its called Chayei Sarah and found in the book of Genesis. In it we hear about Abraham, Abraham has come to Hebron; to the land that g-d has promised him looking for a place to bury his dead wife Sarah. He negotiates with the locals, insisting on paying full price for a piece of land that was offered to him by its owner. This is the first recorded payment for the land of Israel by Jews and its only one of three places in the Chumash (aka the Hebrew Bible) where this happens. And so on this particular Shabbat Jews from all over the world stream into Israel to show their solidarity. Why do Jews do this you might ask? This is because Hebron is one of the most disputed pieces of land in the world. It sits soundly in the West Bank, in an area that is 97% Arab. And so once a year Jews make a pilgrimage to this place, it is one of the holiest places in Israel, Abraham, Sarah, Isaac, Rachel, Adam and Eve are all buried in a cave that sits below what is now an Arab Mosque. This is not exactly the safest place for a Jew in “united Israel” but on this one weekend, everyone floods in. The army sends down extra units and tightens security. And so I found myself going on the adventure of a life time. Before I left with my friends, Todd, Daniel and Yoav, I was asked a simple question; do you know what its like to be in a war zone? “No” well you’re about to. And so early Friday afternoon we loaded our gear on a bus and headed off. Hebron is approximately a forty five minute drive from Jerusalem. We arrived with just enough time to set up camp before the sun went down and Shabbos began. Normally when Shabbos begins a sense of calm fills the air, anything that you didn’t have time to get done must wait for the next 25 hours or so while you are left to yourself to wonder in gods creation, not so this time. As we and the large groups of new friends who we just made welcomed in the Sabbath, gun shots rage softly in the distance. Our Arab neighbors were welcoming us to the neighborhood. We collected our Siddurs (prayer books) and headed off to the Mosque. As we walked down the road; we noticed the multitude of soldiers around us, protecting us. They were tense and we took cue, not the normal soldiers you see in this country dressed down sporting World War II weapons. These were battle ready soldiers. Covered in body armor, grenades on belts, clips loaded into modern weapons. We knew they weren’t messing around, we were surrounded by enemies and they were prepared for trouble. It was quite a sight, as we walked though the Arab town, people living in poverty surrounded us. We saw a dead sheep being dragged down the road, donkeys and chickens walking around the streets and eyes on us everywhere. When we arrived, in the main part of town we found at least 500 men, mostly dressed in black and white. They were singing, dancing and praying, joy was abundant as we celebrated the lives of our fore parents. We entered the building and pushed our way through the praying masses to find the spot where they are buried, the actual spot is in the caves below but this was as close as anyone was getting. Goosebumps covered our arms you could feel the power of that spot on that moment. We all stood in awe of the amazing sight, surrounded by our fellow Jews. We ran into friends from Jerusalem and shared in what we all agreed was a magical moment. Without a proper Shabbos meal planned we went in search of food. After wandering around aimlessly (but staying well within the area we knew to be safe, right mom :) we found a meal. Thanks to an angel a man dressed all in white we managed to find a wonderful meal surrounded by scores of people we washed our hands, said the blessings and dug in. A few hours and many songs, blessings and great conversations later, we headed back to camp, pausing once again to take in the incredible sights of so many of our fellow Jews celebrating our birthright. Little did we know that would be the last time we’d be allowed in, to that most mysterious and wondrous place. Full and tired we settled in for the night, the night came and went with little drama, unless you count me nearly freezing to death because I’m an idiot. I stupidly forgot a basic rule of outdoor survival: in the desert, temperature extremes are the norm, very hot and very cold are a rule and you’d better be prepared. I wasn’t but luckily my travel mates were and thankful they bailed me out. Finally warm, full and happy I dropped off to sleep on the hard ground, completely unaware of the scene that I’d have to deal with in the morning. I awoke early and went outside, within a short time the sun and the temperature and both risen considerably. One of my travel buddies and I were both awake and decided we’d like to go back to the main area and see what was going on, as we walked down the dusty road we looked around, tension was in the air. Then we arrived at the check point before town. We were asked for our id’s and we gave them. Before I knew what was happening me and my friend were separated, and questions were being asked. When it was all over we were told to turn around and not so politely told not to come back to Hebron. Apparently we were entering a ‘closed military zone’. And so with little fanfare we did just that, as we went to leave a solider shouted something at me in Hebrew that I couldn’t understand but my friend translated it for me; “tell your friend to take that stupid ‘effing kippa off his head he’s not fooling anyone.” Shocked but not harmed we went back, resigned to waiting around for the next twelve hours or so until the sun went down and we could get on a bus and leave town. And that should be the end of this story. But boredom can do funny things to people and before long we stuck up a conversation with a soldier hanging around our camp sight. We told him what had happened to us and he persuaded us to coming back up the road with him. Assuring us nothing would happen to us and he’d sort the whole thing out. And so we went, we knew before long that it was a bad idea. A solider was on his radio when he spotted us and before we had a chance to turn around we ran into a line of men. They grabbed me and my friend and pushed us into a car. Our other two friends were stopped and told to turn around. As I sat in the car I decided to have a look around I had barely turned my head before an Israel FBI agent pushed me against the car seat to told me to shut up (strange I didn’t say anything) we were questioned again mostly in Hebrew (very fun for me since I couldn’t understand a thing, I mostly stayed quiet) before long, they got in the car with us and drove down the road thirty feet or so. We kept quite and after a few minutes an officer came into the car. He asked us why we had come back and told us we had been warned, normally that would mean a night or two in jail. For whatever reason we were released, and told once again not to come back, we couldn’t get back to camp fast enough. The story as we were told by our soldier friend was that radical left wing, Arab sympathizers has set a filed on fire the night before and they thought we were part of that group, they didn’t want any trouble from anyone and we were not the only ones who were refused entrance into Hebron that day. Finally the sun went down and we retuned to Jerusalem aka home, with no further incidents. My final thoughts on the trip to Hebron are this: first Friday was a beautiful experience, it was amazing to be in that environment, just when we had just about given up on finding dinner we found it, all of us were extremely grateful. Second since nothing happened to us, this is one of the greatest stories of my life, and must crack the top three and everyone at my Yeshiva wants to hear the story. Third after being in Israel for almost two weeks, Jerusalem has really begun to feel like home. We all felt extremely thankful to see the walls of the old city. So a GREAT trip, even if by the end we all felt like crap, and wanted nothing more then to head home and NEVER return to Hebron ever again. Eretz Israel!!

Cuts, bug bites and bruises

I was looking at my hands this morning and I realized something. Since I’ve gotten to Israel I seem to be acquiring a lot of cuts, bug bites and bruises. I’ve also been mildly sunburned which has turned into a nice deep tan and my body aches. I realized all of this while looking at my somewhat scared body and got very excited! This is why I took off on this adventure after all! My life in New York was great but it felt so sterile, so planned so routine. Here my life certainly follows a schedule. I have classes and many days I simply read, write in this blog, or have discussions with people. But it’s all so constantly in flex, in motion and I love it. This trip was after all a relatively big move it wasn’t the safe thing to do as my body reflects and it’s exactly what I needed. Just a thought I had today in class that I wanted to get down, I miss the US some days but my sore, tired and much maligned body is suffering for the sake of my soaring soul.

A Challenge

This place is really intellectually challenging especially to my liberal northeastern upbringing. I’ve been realizing in the last couple of years that I’m not nearly as liberal as I once thought I was, but it can still be quite a shock when I find a teacher talking about things and I find myself agreeing. Only to realize after some thought that many of my friends at home would think me quite the radical for agreeing with those ideas. But you know what? That’s okay, because it shows my willingness to grow and expand as a human being. After all Winston Churchill said “any man who is under thirty and not a liberal has no heart, any many who is over thirty and not a conservative has no brains.” Not to mention I’ve always had the motivation to challenge my own ideas and the openness to realize I could be wrong. Still it can be quite a shock just the same after all these years, in addition to that my father is no liberal in the American sense of word and I am my father’s son, that’s for certain. Some notes from the last week of classes:

“Judaism is the world’s most politically incorrect idea system”; “America was made great by a bunch of non-Jews who believed in Jewish values and has been taken down by a bunch of Jews who don’t believe in Jewish values.” – Ken Spiro

“How did g-d create the universe? It doesn’t really matter at this point does it?”; “The point of creation is so that g-d should have a dwelling in your most basic, most physical, darkest places.” – Yom Tov Glazer

“The world is more of a thought then a thing” – G. Schroeder, he more then anyone else makes me feel like I’m in the movie Waking Life, which I mentioned in a past post.

“No one can do it perfectly, that’s impossible. It’s a question of how honest you are with yourself.”; “There’s a difference between having an open mind and a hole in your head.”; “In life if you don’t have gratitude you’ll have nothing.”; – M. Berger, he’s quickly becoming my favorite Rabbi here, I don’t agree with him about everything(or much really) but he always leaves me thinking.

“The price you pay for love is commitment.” – S. Schwartz

Yom Tov and the Dead Sea

Today was one of the most amazing days of my life. Yesterday morning I found out that me and a few other newly arrived students here at Aish HaTorah would be going on a field trip with Yom Tov Glazer. Yom Tov is the kind of guy who could make me give up my entire life back at home and spend the next ten years studying at the Yeshiva. He grew up secular, toured the world surfing, until one day when he happened upon Jerusalem and sixteen years later he’s still here. He exudes spirituality, he doesn’t even have to try to, he just is. So last night we were sitting around the Rova square which is one of the main centers of the Jewish Quarter here in Jerusalem, smoking hookah, Benyomin and others were rapping (Ben was in a fairly successful band back in California before he got tired of his physically fulfilling but spirituality empty life) this place is crazy. It’s a mix between a college campus and the holiest place you could ever imagine. It’s an amazing mix of energy that I doubt I’ll tire of quickly. With an adventure planned for the morning I called it a night and went to bed. I awoke full of verve. I grabbed my Teffilin and Siddur and headed to the Kotel. With my morning prayer done I headed for breakfast and our adventure soon began. We headed out of the Old City, through East Jerusalem, it’s bizarre because the Israelis recently celebrated the 40th anniversary of the reunification of Jerusalem and yet the city is in no way complete. No Jew’s exist in the East and to go there is not just foolhardy but very unsafe. We passed the Mount of Olives (religious Jews believe that when the messiah comes, those buried in the Mount will get to walk with the messiah into the gates of heaven) and through the tunnel. With Jerusalem behind us we drove, as the scenery passed by, I was struck (not for the first time) with the unbelievable beauty of this place, it’s indescribable. We drove down, down past sea level until we arrived. We hiked though the brush, until we arrived at the spot Yom Tov had in mind. The first order of business was a through rub down with the mud on the flats; it’s incredibly smooth and great for the skin. Now that we all looked like swamp people we headed off. There was a cliff and a deep pool and after a little convincing (and watching, one crazy Aussie and one crazy Rabbi do it first) I took the plunge. It’s an amazing feeling running as fast as you can off a cliff into the salty waters, I quickly scrambled up the cliff ready for more. Then it was off to the hot springs, the Rabbi quickly engaged us in conversation (not the first or last of the day for sure) talking about life, the pursuit of wisdom and about our own person journeys to Israel, it was special. It’s in many ways a completely selfish pursuit; most of our usual energies are focused outwards, changing the world in various ways. The word Israel is derived from the story of Jacob, Jacob on his way home to the land of his father Isaac, knowing he is about to be confronted by his older brother Esav. Esav has raised an army in order to prevent Jacob from returning. The night before the encounter Jacob spends the night alone in his tent, when an angel enters, Jacob struggles all throughout the night with this angel, until as day is dawning the angel blesses him and gives him a new name, Israel the word literally means spiritual struggle. And much like Jacob all of us here are engaged in our own spiritual battles. We then proceeded to our second to last activity of the day: sensory deprivation. With ear plugs firmly in our ears we wadded out into the Dead Sea, relaxing our entire bodies and closing our eyes the only thing to focus on was the sound of our own breathing. It is an experience I will never forget. After a satisfying lunch it was time to head back to the city of light. With my skin feeling wonderful, and tired out from the days activities here I am again. I often wondered why exactly I decided to pick up a life I loved to come to a foreign land, in moments like this I know exactly why. Eretz Israel.

Waking Life

Have you ever seen the movie waking life? If you never have, it might be the only way I can properly describe what it’s like living here. Everyday I feel like I’m bombarded with mind boggling information, it feels like living in a dream, and just as I love this movie and I love being here.

First Shabbos in Jerusalem

Shabbos ended in Jerusalem a few hours ago and I made it! Phew, this city is a truly magical place but none more so then on Shabbos. With a full moon rising over the Kotel (Wailing Wall) the black and whites as I like to call them (the Orthodox Jews) began to fill the area, I watching this with one of my new friends Yitzchak (he’s from South Carolina and a Jewish convert) we went down to the wall and davened before heading back up to the terrace, we talked for a while and then headed our separate ways. I went to dinner with old friends from NY one of whom’s brother lives two minutes away from me in the Old City, dinner was amazing, filled with children running around, lots of singing, drinking wine, and amazing conversation. Then I headed off to bed, I awoke full of vigor (late, I missed Morning Prayer but I’m still fighting a bit of jet lag) and then wandered around, hooking up with some new friends before heading off to lunch with one of the Rabbis who does work for Aish. Another illuminating and wild meal ensued before I sleepily headed back to my room. I met up with some roommates / friends, and we sat around our kitchen table, making jokes, talking about stupid stuff and just generally being stupid boys. As Shabbos came to a close we did the division ceremony and then the world went back to normal, phones were turned on, computers brought out and life went back to normal. Shabbos is amazing when you go a whole day without changing anything, even the mundane becomes extraordinary. Most people go there entire lives without realizing the miracle in the everyday, the ordinary. I had a wonderful first Shabbos in Israel, I’ve been shown nothing but warmth and kindness everywhere I go thus far and I’m truly grateful for that.

Jerusalem pt.2

Jerusalem is a festival and a lamentation. Its song is a sigh
across the ages, a delicate, robust, mournful psalm at the great junction of spiritual cultures. David K. Shipler

Jerusalem

I have arrived in Jerusalem; well to be technical I got here yesterday but just the same. As I write this I’m sitting in my new place with a bunch of guys around me, and I couldn’t be happier. I already feel like I’ve been here for a few weeks, everyone here is so welcoming, they immediately made me feel like I belong which is a huge relief. After stressing about what I’d be doing for the last few weeks it feels really great to be in it now, the anticipation of the event was as always more stressful then the event itself. Now I know as I’m here longer things will inevitably come up, I’ll meet people I don’t like, I’ll argue with people over lifestyle choices, etc. This is life after all and life is tough, but it just feels really good to be here now. I had my first day of classes, and there are a few Rabbis that I was drawn to immediately, so it all made for a very interesting first day that’s for sure. The flow of Yeshiva life is definitely going to be an adjustment, lunch for instance is a mad rush, I kept running into people, within five minutes I stopped apologizing and just pushed my way through. My head is on a swivel, every twenty minutes I find myself looking out the windows of Aish at the Kotel and thinking “Am I really here?” Yup! Highlights of classes today: Jewish History with Rabbi Ken Spiro, Practical Spirituality with Rabbi Yom Tov Glaser (who happens to be the brother of a Rabbi I know in New York) and Contemporary Issues with Rabbi Motty Berger (he’s very physical, always hugging everyone but a really genuine, good soul), a few pieces of knowledge for your pleasure:

There are four Holy cities in Israel: Jerusalem represents fire, Hebron (Earth), Tiberias (water) and Tsfat (air)

People are angered by critique only to the extent that they believe its true.

In the way man wants to be, God leads him

All is well, I’m looking forward to Shabbos tomorrow. Much love and Eretz Israel.

Jersey

Its really starting to feel real now just had to say it. Yesterday I moved out of New York and now I’m sitting at home talking with my parents, unpacking so I can repack and realizing that in less then five days I’ll be gone. It’s hard to explain the gamut of emotions that I’m dealing with on a daily basis but at the end of it all I’m just really excited and I feel ready for the next challenge. I’d like to take a moment to thank all of the wonderful people in my life for being so supportive I feel truly blessed to be surrounded by so many people who want nothing more then to help me, I do not take it for granted. Now I’m sitting here in the quiet town I grew up in, after living in New York for a year its weird to realize that I had gotten used to a general level of background noise all the time. Out here in New Jersey there is none of that, especially on a beautiful autumn Saturday. That’s all for now.

A view from my window

Looking down



North

South

Looking out from 57th street and 5th avenue, my former office. Excellent view, good people, off to Israel in 13 days.

Next Year in Jerusalem

I got this quote from a great article titled “Next Year in Jerusalem” it is an incredibly moving piece of journalism. It chronicles a young mans journey from secular life to Orthodox Judaism. I don’t relate to any one character in it more then any other, I just think it’s an exceedingly honest account of the intellectual and emotion struggle involved when one has their faith or lack there of challenged. A copy of the article in its entirety can be found in PDF format here.

It seemed that losing your faith and losing your lack of faith had much in common. At some point you were suspended between two competing, self-consistent realities, knowing you had to go back or forward, with no one to help you and no net. And once you were out there, you realized that skeptic and believer were mirror images, reflecting a vision of logic in the universe. – Next Year in Jerusalem p.14

The countdown officially begins

Isn’t it weird how you can trick yourself into believing things sometimes? Case in point I spent all last week ‘not’ freaking out about my trip. I talked to tons of people most of which I got one of two responses from: “That’s amazing, have a wonderful time”, or “Wow your effing crazy” and everyone asked me how I was feeling. And I glibly assured everyone that I was feeling great, wasn’t worried a bit and taking care of business. And I even managed to convince myself of this. But here is there truth: I was freaking out, totally and completely. Luckily for me I have wonderful people in my life. On Saturday me and an old college roommate, one of my best friends caught the New York Metropolitans game in Flushing Meadows, a weekend we had had planned for over a month. When we made the plans we weren’t expecting the Met’s to be fights for their playoff lives, but they were. And so we witnessed a truly magical game, needing a win badly the Mets put a hurting on the visiting Nationals. The intrepid John Maine came within four outs of a no hitter, it was one of the greatest games I’ve ever been to. (note: they got creamed the next day and missed the playoffs, in one of the biggest collapses in sports history but I don’t want to talk about it) that game was still remarkable. The next morning we caught the new Wes Anderson movie the Darjeeling Limited. I could try to describe why I love his movies so much but as with all great art I can’t. This movie like his other three, The Life Aquatic, The Royal Tannenbaum’s and Rushmore just makes me feel good about life. It might be the best of the bunch, maybe it’s just because it’s a story about a spiritual journey and I’m about the embark on my own, but I couldn’t hide my smile as I walked out of the theatre. As we walked home I was stuck (not for the first time) by the beauty of New York, it was a picture perfect autumn day. And I was inspired to create a: why I love New York post for this blog. I can think of no better tribute for the city that has given me without a doubt the greatest year of my life. Look for a picture collection courtesy of my new camera before I leave. I then spent the rest of the day with my family, watching football and sleeping on the couch. It was just what I needed to clear my head. Because as I was saying at the beginning of this post I was not dealing with my move well, it’s not easy to just pick up a leave a place you love to chase a dream. What if that dream is just a seductive illusion? What if I find out my adventure is an exercise in futility and I could have gotten what I wanted in New York, a place where I’m happy? These are questions that haunt me. Unfortunately I’ll never know the answers all I can do is trust my instinct and accept that I’ll never know everything. I have to thank my wonderful family and friends for helping me collect my thoughts and for listening to me. I am truly blessed to have people in my life who understand me so well. And so my journey is a scarce three weeks away. My plans are now coming together; I got accepted into school, made my flight plans and created a very long list of things to do. It’s all beginning to become very real now. Enjoy the beautiful autumn season.

tel aviv sunset

This is one of the last pictures I took before I left Israel almost two years ago, since then I've looked at it almost every day and dreamed of the time I would return.

A Beginning

I started this blog because I’m about to embark on a journey to an unknown land. Really you could say I started this journey a little over twenty three years ago, and this blog is just picking up after what I’ll call a short break. I’ve wanted to travel back to Israel since I first went there almost two years ago. I made a false attempt last summer after I had graduated from college but the timing simply wasn’t right. Now however I’m going and I’d like this blog to give anyone who reads it a first hand account of my adventure. Let’s start at the beginning, after spending the last year working and living in New York I’d begun to realize that the dream I’d nearly started last year was still nagging me. Last summer I was as close to going to Israel as one could get: I had signed up for a program, been accepted and begun taking the necessary steps to go. Then a few things happened. One a war broke out between Israel and Lebanon, two my sister was getting married. And lastly I began to have lingering doubts that the real reason I wanted to go was I simply didn’t feel ready to start my adult life and I would be running away to Israel just to avoid growing up. All of those were valid reasons for staying in the United States. But now I don’t have those issues to deal with Israel is at peace (well as much at peace as you can hope for), my wonderful sister has been happily married for almost a year now, and most importantly I’ve spent a year living on my own. I moved into a wonderful little place on the Upper West Side of Manhattan, in the process I worked for two investment banks, and in short living an extremely fulfilling life. I’ve been happy, well adjusted and busy. I love my life in New York and couldn’t have asked for a better year. And yet this itch refused to go away, I found myself dreaming of Israel and so I decided I needed to go. I began talking to friends, family and my two trusted Rabbi’s. No one told me anything they all agreed I needed to follow my heart. And yet I can’t just pick up my life can I? I’ve worked so hard to get where I am now, sacrificed so much, endured months of doubt, I couldn’t just pick up and leave. I needed a sign. What’s that old saying? Be careful what you wish for you just might just get it. Last Thursday I received my sign, I found out (all in the same day) that I would be losing my job, that my roommate was moving to North Carolina with his girlfriend and getting married (a big Mazal Tov!! to the two of them, I wish you both much health, happiness and love) and weeks before this day I had scheduled a meeting with my rabbi to discuss going to Israel. There it was: the trifecta. And so by the end of the day the wheels were put into motion, I’m going to Israel. Since that moment I’ve alternated between being excited and scared. I doubt that, that duality will go away, there’s so much to do and so little time, but at the end of this mad rush I’ll be in Israel. So what am I trying to accomplish with this blog? I have no great aspirations to be a writer I’m sure regular readers will quickly realize that I lack fundamentally good writing skills. But I thought this could be a good way to keep my friends and family informed of my activities without sending out impersonal mass emails. I also thought it would good to keep a journal to document my activities as a record of my travels and maybe just maybe by writing down what I’m learning it will help me make sense of this trip. I don’t know where this journey will take me but I’m prepared to let it happen and take it as it comes. So welcome to my journey it should be fun.